A glimpse of what the future may hold?

This week saw college hosting the National Opera Studio for a short series of recitals, workshops and a gala concert with the WNO Orchestra. This was the first attempt at so close a collaboration between the NOS and RWCMD, and initial feedback seems to suggest we may expect this to happen again next year, and maybe even grow into a larger project.

I can only speak for myself and say how I felt it went and what I got out of it. I can also only hope the NOS Trainees felt welcome and didn't find working with us too much of a chore. From my point of view it was interesting to see what might be in store for those of us lucky enough to progress to studying at the Studio in a couple of years' time. I suppose all these thoughts started when we saw the first lunchtime recital on Wednesday, got to read the Trainees' biographies and relate them to what we could see and hear onstage. First impressions: average age is higher than on our course and most of them have already worked with professional opera companies, so perhaps a break between college and somewhere like the NOS is not a bad idea... Also, the voices on show were fairly securely established, in the sense that they were already focussing on repertoire specific to their voice types. More on that later.

After said recital we had a joint workshop, in which I was fortunate enough to sing. It felt slightly contrived at first, with neither cohort quite knowing what it was meant to be about, and with some visible differences in attitude and approach, but under Alma's guidance it turned into an enjoyable ice-breaking session, complete with all sorts of inappropriate banter. The nice thought for me personally was that I didn't feel vastly inferior (self-centered approach, I know, but let's be honest: we all compare ourselves to our superiors, peers, etc). It also got us talking to the guys from the Studio, which was good.

We then had an informal recital in the Foyer, which generated some positive feedback from the assembled audience. How about an uplifting quote: 'You know, apart from them being older, there isn't that big a difference between the two groups.'

After that was a fascinating Q&A session with people from WNO (the Director of Artistic Administration, Head of Music Staff, and Casting Administrator) about auditions, what it's like to work for WNO, etc.

The following day saw the Studio gang rehearsing with the orchestra, which gave us the opportunity to work with the Director of the NOS: Kathryn Harries. I promise to write about that class, complete with notes from her that perhaps my singer readers will find useful, but I'll do that in a separate post.

Friday was the big night, the gala concert. I have to say, having heard them on Wednesday, backed by the incredible WNO Orchestra with some inspiring baton-work from Stuart Stratford, the Trainees upped their game and gave a great performance. Again, they were all shown in repertoire specifically chosen for their voices, and had the opportunity to shine, an opportunity most of them made the best of. This did make for a bit of a same-y programme, but the concert was short enough to not be boring. After the concert we retired to the bar, where some schmoozing took place, however exhausted as I was after the half-week of being under pressure (or at least perceived or self-inflicted pressure) to measure up to the NOS singers (I have to say, this is all in my insecure head, the guys themselves are a great bunch, very supportive and easy-going), I quickly decided to withdraw to what we affectionately call 'the dark side', which means I left the posh theatre bar and passed through the keycard-locked doors to our cheap and cheerful student bar.

There I met up with the Opera'r Ddraig gang who had just finished rehearsals and after the bar closed we headed into town for one last quiet drink in the Bunk House (my favourite place in Cardiff). To our surprise it wasn't long before the entire NOS team ended up there as well! And I have to say, it was a fantastic end to a difficult week. No pressure, a chance to talk over a drink, everyone still buzzing after the concert... Good times!

From talking with the NOS cohort, it is obvious that the Studio is a great springboard for a career, but has to be timed well. The programme is incredibly intensive, quite short (only 9 months), so really it's vital that you know you can handle working in the profession before you even apply, because over the course of their time at the Studio, the singers are heard by everyone who is anyone in the UK operatic industry. It's vital you have the stamina to deliver at all times, and also to have a clear vision of what you want to do, or what your voice is able to do, what roles you will be going for. Because of the exposure you really want to be able to work straight away. Of course, nothing is guaranteed... In any case, the simple fact of getting through the auditions process should mean that you have what it takes. But there are always exceptions, and best not to be one of them, which is why I think it's better to give it a lot of thought and prepare a plan for yourself beforehand, rather than taking a punt at auditioning. Of course, there are only 12 places, so while you're planning, better prepare a plan B. And C, and... You get the idea.

On a personal note, my 'conversation of the week' was with a tenor who until a year ago had been a baritone. He told me what the change had been like, why he left it so late, and also compared himself to me (that comparison had been made a couple of times before by other people as well, which is why I was so glad to see him in Bunk House and have a nice chat with him) and offered the best advice he could: be careful, patient, and don't do anything because people tell you you're a tenor. Let the voice decide.

So bearing that in mind, maybe I shouldn't audition for NOS until the voice has decided ;)

What it's all about

Moving away from the somewhat depressing nature of my previous post, I would just like to say that rejections aside, this week has been amazingly good!

Why the change in attitude? There's nothing like performance therapy! Yesterday I had the good fortune to sing a concert with some phenomenal colleagues (both in terms of talent and fun) for an incredibly encouraging and responsive audience. Anyone who has an opportunity to perform in the Beulah United Reformed Church's concerts: count yourselves lucky! You just can't beat the atmosphere there. I've been lucky enough to sing there twice now, and both times were a confidence-boosting, rewarding experience.

To those of you who are reading this and thinking 'Who is writing this sickly-sweet drivel and what has he done with the jaded, cynical Jan we all know and love?': well, a great concert will do that to you. I'm sure I'll be back to my old self pretty soon, but for now, let me have some satisfaction ;)

Four doors shut, another one... well, I'm still waiting on that one ;)

My first week back has been one of exciting work, a very rewarding short recording project, a nice series of catch-ups, but mostly this week seems to have been about rejection. In quick succession all of the responses from the auditions I had last term came back negative. I won't lie, I take these things quite hard, even though statistically speaking I should be used to it by now.

There are however thoughts that put it all in perspective, and I choose to list these here for future reference, in case circumstances change and they don't come to me as quickly and easily as they have this week (thanks to the unique holidays I had):

- I am amazingly fortunate to be doing what I do (however much I may like to complain from time to time ;) )

- I have had a year of some success (2011 couldn't last forever unfortunately).

- I am still in college, so have time and it will be a period of growth.

- There are other opportunities out there.

- Worst case scenario I will have summer holidays!

- I do have something to offer, it's just that my strongest points aren't immediately apparent in an audition (could use some tips on how to put across conscientious, gets on well with colleagues, etc to a panel!)

- Getting used to rejection without equating it to failure is a necessary professional skill, as is patience.

- There's one more, ask me about in person if you can ;)

How about some random pictures to lift the mood? A reminder of a unique Christmas, home, dear friends, and generally things that matter:

Kraków Christmas market

A half-day with my brother

Off to find signal during our New Year's retreat

How does the opera singer relax? By making music, of course...

It's been a while since I posted anything, which is understandable, as I haven't had anything 'singery' to do over the holidays. I also had a moment of doubt as to whether it was worth carrying on with this blog or not, but that had a lot to do with the rather surreal time I've had in my personal life lately and the fact that I'm now engaged in reading a blog that is actually about something real, and not just a pointless exercise in personal vanity... In the end I decided that the best way to get through a tough time is to carry on with your normal routine, so here I am again, making the assumption that someone may find reading my insignificant drivel interesting.

So let's make our way out of the trough of mild depression and onto the crest of holiday fun. I am proud to report that I wasn't completely lazy over the last couple of weeks, managing to devote a fair bit of time to learning Le Nozze di Figaro, though as usual, the original plan was to also squeeze in a few other bits and bobs, in which I predictably failed (those were optional though, so I'm ok!). What I think some of you may find interesting, though, is not the work I did, but the ways I found to relax.

To give this a bit of context, I'll tell you a bit about my group of closest friends, with whom I spent 5 days around New Year's Eve and Day. We all come from a scouting background, where the main sources of fun are the outdoors, fire (in the camp-fire sense, not the dangerous obsession sense), and a guitar. So when we arrived in my parent's cottage in the Beskidy mountains, we had 2 guitars, 2 djembe drums and an assortment of percussive instruments, plus anything we found in the house (spoons, lampshades, and a cheese grater). I pity those who had plans to catch up on some sleep over those couple of days, as we stayed up until around 4am every night going through our favourite songs from our scouting days, improvising harmonies on nonsensical spur-of-the-moment lyrics, dancing to quasi-african drum beats and rapping to a backing track I lovingly played on my iPad's hip-hop drum machine app. I generally find that when I do find time off, I avoid singing like the plague, but after a week of silence in Kraków, this free-form music-making was the most fun I've had in ages. There's nothing like being yourself, both personally and musically in a tight group of friends.

All good things come to an end, however, and before we knew it, it was time to go back to Kraków. The music-making was, as it turned out, far from over. This same group of friends took me out to a jam-session in on of my old haunts, the Harris Piano Jazz Bar. These jam-sessions are held regularly and my friends try to make as many as they can. The music is mainly blues, with an established band opening and closing the concert, to get people in the mood and then wind the party down. A good third of the audience are musicians with instruments in hand, who then take to the stage as and when they know the songs being played. The atmosphere is electric, seats hard to come by, the floor a tightly packed swaying (and, in the latter part of the evening, dancing) throng. It all takes me back to my high-school and early uni days, when I had a band of my own and it used to be us up there on the stage... I love what I do now, but I do miss the feel of the mic stand in my hands, the lights, the noise, and the feeling of being myself (not a character in a play) and letting go while belting out a good song (or even one of our own ;) ). So inevitably, I end up jumping up to join the guys when I hear a familiar intro! Anyone interested in starting up a band in Cardiff? Just kidding... there's never enough time. But a jam session? Maybe there's a club that holds them from time to time. At least I know the Harris jams will from now on be an obligatory feature of my visits home.

For anyone curious, here's a taste of Polish blues-rock history, and the very song I sang:

Is this a chamber orchestra which I see before me?

It's been a couple of days since term finished. I'm now back home in Poland and my body has decided some rest is long overdue, and has basically shut down. I'm not really surprised, I've felt some form of crash coming for a couple of weeks now, and I'm just glad I made it to the end of my singing commitments in fair shape.

One of these commitments, one in particular was a challenge, albeit an exciting one. Last Friday I sang in the RWCMD's Opera Gala with the college orchestra. It has to be said, this is probably a form of performing that I am the least used to: static concert with orchestra. It presents a unique set of problems, some of which I was ready for and some of which threw me in the first days of rehearsals.

First of all, the orchestra is behind you, in close proximity. The last time I dealt with a situation like that was performing in the Gate with Opera'r Ddraig and (to a lesser degree due to the size of the ensemble) also with the Rogue Opera Company. However there we had a fairly large stage space all to ourselves as the singers, and a set to navigate, and if anything it was difficult to hear the orchestra in places. With a pit orchestra, being onstage you usually hear very little of the orchestra, and that creates its own set of problems, especially with keeping time. In the college concert hall on the other hand, the sound from the not-so-chamber* orchestra was always close, and always on the edge of being overpowering (I'm speaking of my feeling onstage, not the received balance in the auditorium). That coupled with the acoustic of the hall (which I know to be excellent as far as the audience is concerned, but tricky for myself as a performer) meant that especially during first rehearsals of pieces, where the orchestra were reading the music, and sorting out balance seemed an unattainable dream, I was standing there, singing, but not getting anything back from the hall, hearing nothing but the orchestra. It's difficult to resist the temptation to try and 'give more' in that situation, but we have to, because let's face it: in a loudness war against 40 players, we don't stand a chance. So the only recourse is to stick to what worked in the piano rehearsals and trust that the conductor will sort out the balance somewhere down the line.

RWCMD Chamber Orchestra, conducted by David Jones, rehearsing excerpts from Don Giovanni with Dorothea Herbert and Will Helliwell

The next awkward difficulty was with how static the performance had to be due to the limited ammount of space and also the necessity to constantly sing straight out. For someone who is used to a certain degree of 'acting' even in recital settings, this was a new-ish experience. After all, it's difficult to not let the music and text move you, or in a way even take over your body, and we all want to show that we're not just voices, but it's necessary to find a way to feed that into the confines of a concert performance.

Then we move on to the standard difficulty of moving from working with piano to getting used to the orchestral sound. This has a new dimension because of the proximity I mentioned before. On top the usual issues of lacking the piano's percussive element and the difference in texture, depending on where you stand, you lose half of what's going on. Standing by the first violins for the entire concert, I must admit I missed the cellos and double bass, especially as normally they would be my first point of reference as a baritone.

I guess the only advice that works when shifting to a new sound world is to stick to what you know and get on with it, trusting that those responsible for the big picture will get it right. Thankfully this concert was a success and the experience of working on it was a valuable one. I hope the orchestra enjoyed it as well, I know accompanying is not their favourite job. Not only is it seemingly less rewarding than other types of repertoire, but it's also incredibly difficult, and I have to say I was amazed at how well the players handled it. From my point of view, an orchestra accompanies much less than the piano. Because of the colour, richness, and (let's face it) volume, it feels more like they 'lift' the entire piece, with the voices just sitting lightly on top and being a bit of a finishing touch (soundwise, though we also have the text and story). I personally felt much more like a part of a bigger picture than like a soloist.

I apologise to any singers among my readers, this must all seem like I'm stating the obvious, but in case you hadn't noticed, that's what this blog is mostly about. Besides, it's good to remind oneself of the obvious every now and again.

* With regards to the size of the orchestra in relation to the form of the concert, a friend of mine upon walking into the hall to sit in on a rehearsal said: 'Holy <expletive>!'

Auditions - a rant

It's been a busy term in college. Not only the standard workload of classes, ensembles to learn and assessments to complete, but several additional projects: Orpheus in the Underworld, concerts, collaborations with composers, managing Opera'r Ddraig's finances... but despite all that going on, what defined the term for me were the auditions. It seemed relentless, there always being an audition on the horizon, but now that I look back, I realise there were only 4 of them! Still, spaced out every 2 weeks or so, it was a pretty full-on 2 months worth.

I have to say, while they are in no way a pleasant experience, I do feel I'm doing better at them than last year (regardless of the outcomes - I'm still waiting for responses from all of them). I suppose it's mainly down to 3 things. Firstly, for the first time in my life I feel reasonably secure in my technique. There's plenty to improve, but at least these days it's consistent. Secondly, I have found much better audition repertoire for myself since I 'discovered' the top of my voice. Last year I was auditioning for opera courses with arias I had been singing for years, back when a top G was a feat (and not a guaranteed one at that!). I sang them fine, but they didn't show off any of the aspects of my voice that could be considered 'selling-points'. I couldn't have honestly said that I felt I sang them better than anyone else in at least some way (and if you don't feel you're bringing something exceptional to the table, then I'm pretty sure the panel won't feel it either). Finally, the amount of experience I've accumulated this past year (and let's face it, it's been a busy one: 6 operas, with substantial roles in 3 of them; first professional engagement with an opera company; vocal boot camp in the Rockies...) has significantly changed my outlook on the whole thing. I know I'm unlikely to succeed in any given audition, but I'm also able to think that I'm good enough to stand a fighting chance, and not to let the hopelessness of this profession get me down.

Why is it hopeless? I suppose that is putting it a bit harshly. It's just hard. These past months have given me a glimpse of the future, the dreaded 'year of fear', out of college, looking for work, living from audition to audition, probably working part-time to get the money for train fares... Then what is an audition? It's a day of stress, travel, preparation, all for a 5-15 minute window of opportunity. Before you get that opportunity however, you sit (or pace) in the waiting-room, surrounded by countless other singers, some of whom will (probably unknowingly) say things that intimidate or put you off. That is if there is even a waiting-room! I recently did an audition where there was only a freezing corridor. Then you enter a room, and your first glimpse of it is always a surprise. It's never what you expect it to be (listening through the door to the 3 or 4 singers before you, all of whom are of course amazing!), and neither is the panel. Even though they spent 10 minutes chatting to the person before you, they barely give you a single glance. Or maybe they're so far away you can't make out their faces. Or maybe they're so friendly you're taken aback. Hopefully you've had some time for a chat with the accompanist about tempi, odd corners, etc, but it's only now that you'll hear him play your intro (always a scary moment, especially if it goes horribly wrong). Fingers crossed that you won't be constantly worrying about the piano. The singing bit is the easiest part, it always seems to be just a bit worse than in practice, which is fine. Then a short chat with the panel, hoping they won't ask off-putting questions like 'So what are you doing about the middle of your voice?' (and I thought I had sung quite well at that one!). Or perhaps no chat, just a 'Thank you, bye!' (what did I do wrong?). Then back on the Tube, train, hours to run the whole thing back in your mind (even though it all goes fuzzy the moment you step out of the audition room) and try and think why the panel behaved the way they did and what to change for the next audition.

And how many of these will it take before you get a break? How much will you end up spending on travel? How much is the stress going to ruin your health? Why are you even doing this in the first place?

Well, the answer to that is: Because once you start rehearsing, you will be reminded that this is the best job in the world, and when you step onto the stage, it just gets better!

Dare to do more! - Natalie Dessay

We'd known since last year that she was coming, but it seemed too good to be true. Even as plans changed at the last minute I found myself worrying that it might not actually happen... but it did! Today we were visited by Natalie Dessay, who spent half a day working with our sopranos (and Joe). Originally we were all to have had the chance to sing to her, however circumstances forced her to shorten her visit, which was a shame, but still, we got a rare opportunity handed to us!

She insisted that the class be closed and straight away said she was probably more nervous than we were. All nerves were soon forgotten once she started working with our girls though. I'm not going to write a long spiel about what an incredible person she is, but I will confess to being surprised at how friendly, down-to-earth, genuine, unassuming and warm she was. Watching her work just put a smile on my face, and the fact that every now and again we were treated to her singing was an added bonus! In fact, everyone left the room with huge grins on their faces :) (or should I say: :D )

I could go on about how amazing it all was, but I don't want to come over as star-struck (even though I admit I actually am!). I'd rather post some quotes from her that I jotted down during the class. Perhaps some of you will find them helpful / insightful or funny, I will personally probably find myself revisiting this post to refresh my memory of a great day.

The one thing that she said to almost everybody, referring to many different aspects of performance, was this: Dare to do more! (Dare to be pianississimo; Dare to move; Dare to do it faster; Dare to take more time; Dare to use more ornamentation; etc) I think that sums up what I felt her approach is all about: never holding back anything, infusing every word, every note with intention and energy, heightening every contrast to the extreme, etc. Cliches? Perhaps, but hey!, if it works, it works.

Quotes:

Accompany yourself with your body! - on posture/stillness, not getting stuck and allowing your body freedom to move

You can't think and plan to the end, because you're not supposed to know what you're going to say. - on recit

If you have an aria on 1 idea, you have to work harder to add contrast to keep the audience surprised.

It's easier to sing if you're in control of the orchestra, than when being controlled by the orchestra. - on daring to 'drive' the piece rather than sit in the back seat

Using vibrato protects the voice. - on vocal hygiene, she also was an advocate of as round a sound as possible without losing clarity of text

If you want us to follow the text, you have to build it for us by using the punctuation.

Coloratura is not a question of voice, it's a question of articulation and precision.

In French music almost NEVER portamento. And even when it's written... think again!

Dare to go as far as possible with interpretation, even if you don't keep it when you go to perform. - on daring to deliberately sing flat and 'ugly', or just to not sing on ahs and ohs

Because you're able to do it so fast... maybe a bit faster? - on coloratura

Dare to add everything you want... but in style! - on ornamentation

Do you have a cadenza for this? (...) I don't like it, it's too simple.

Invent something that I wouldn't invent myself. - again on ornamentation, which allows you to show your personality and imagination

What is better for your voice, to go up, or to go down? Up? Well then go up! - on cadenzas

And finally our favourite quote, when working on Manon's aria Adieu, notre petite table:

I know it's written forte, but I think that's stupid. I called Massenet on the phone and told him it can't be like that.

The best thing about today was that everyone enjoyed it, including Natalie Dessay. In fact, there's another quote: Now that I see you are good, I will come back, which was a joke of course, but she mentioned returning a couple of times, so fingers crossed!

Photos by Kiran Ridley